I made a list of ways to show my husband love with words. If you’ve ever read about the different ways people seem to need in order to feel loved, then maybe you’ll remember that words is one of those things that everyone needs, but that some really crave.
Of course, as opposites attract, words are the hardest for me to give. They maybe matter least to me. The praise of others rolls off my back if I find fault in what I have done. I’ve mentioned I’m a perfectionist and gifted fault finder, which means words of criticism come easier than words of affirmation.
So, I worked at it. I made a list. I wrote a poem. I made a video. I designed a t-shirt. I bought cards and a couple children’s books.
My husband liked them, but then he told me he didn’t need those things. His love language changed, seriously changed to match mine, the kind I gave easily, without thinking. It was a gift from God to my husband and to me. Now when I say words of affirmation, he treasures them deeply, knowing I didn’t “work” at producing them.
I have thought my kids had one love language, such as touch for my cuddle bugs, but then as they grew it seemed to change. But maybe now my approach has changed, I think I’ll just love them and ask God to translate the message.